English text variants MOTD


Calls `fortune` and prints it as is, in Jive and Valspeak.


Tools — Small utilities, gadgets & scripts to perform daily tasks.

English text

Iowans ask why Minnesotans don't drink more Kool-Aid. That's because they can't figure out how to get two quarts of water into one of those little paper envelopes.

English variant — jive

Iowans ax' why Minnesotans duzn't drink mo'e Kool-Aid. Dat's a'cuz dey kin't figure out how t'get two quarts uh booze into one uh dose little sheet envelopes.

English variant — valspeak

Iowans ask why Minnesotans don't drink more Kool-Aid. That's because they can't figure out how to get two quarts of water into one of those little paper envelopes.