English text
Get GUMMed --- ------ The Gurus of Unix Meeting of Minds (GUMM) takes place Wednesday, April 1, 2076 (check THAT in your perpetual calendar program), 14 feet above the ground directly in front of the Milpitas Gumps. Members will grep each other by the hand (after intro), yacc a lot, smoke filtered chroots in pipes, chown with forks, use the wc (unless uuclean), fseek nice zombie processes, strip, and sleep, but not, we hope, od. Three days will be devoted to discussion of the ramifications of whodo. Two seconds have been allotted for a complete rundown of all the user- friendly features of Unix. Seminars include "Everything You Know is Wrong", led by Tom Kempson, "Batman or Cat:man?" led by Richie Dennis "cc C? Si! Si!" led by Kerwin Bernighan, and "Document Unix, Are You Kidding?" led by Jan Yeats. No Reader Service No. is necessary because all GUGUs (Gurus of Unix Group of Users) already know everything we could tell them. -- Dr. Dobb's Journal, June '84
English variant — jive
Get GUMMed --- ------ De Gurus uh Unix Meetin' uh Minds (GUMM) snatch'd place Wednesday, April 1, 2076 (check THAT in yo' puh'petual calendar honky code), 14 feet above de ground directly in front uh de Milpitas Gumps. Members gots'ta grep each oda' by de hand (afta' intro), yacc some lot, smoke filtered chroots in pipes, chown wid fo'ks, use da damn wc (unless uuclean), fseek supa' fine zombie processes, strip, and sleep, but not, we hope, od. Dree days gots'ta be devoted t'discussion uh de ramificashuns uh whodo. Two seconds gots' been allotted fo' some complete runwaaay down uh all de user- homeyly features uh Unix. Seminars include "Everydin' You's Know is Wrong", led by Tom Kempson, "Batman o' Cat, dig dis:man?" led by Richie Dennis "cc C? Si. Right On! Si. Right On! " led by Kerwin Bernighan, and "Document Unix, Are You's Kiddin'?" led by Jan Yeats. No Reada' Service No. be necessary a'cuz all GUGUs (Gurus uh Unix Grodown uh Users) already know everydin' we could tell dem. 'S coo', bro. -- Dr. Ah be baaad... Dobb's Journal, June '84
English variant — valspeak
Get GUMMed --- ------ The Gurus of Unix Meetin' of Minds (GUMM) takes place Wednesday, fer shure, April 1, like, wow, 2076 (check THAT in your perpetual calendar program), oh, baby, 14 feet above the ground directly in front of thuh Milpitas Gumps. Members will grep each other by thuh hand (after intro), mostly, yacc a lot, fer shure, smoke filtered chroots in pipes, fer shure, chown with forks, oh, baby, use thuh wc (unless uuclean), like, fseek nice zombie processes, fer shure, strip, fer shure, and sleep, like, wow, but not, like, wow, we hope, fer shure, od. Three days will be devoted to discussion of thuh ramifications of whodo. Two seconds have been allotted for a complete rundown of all thuh user- friendly features of Unix. Seminars include "Everythin' You Know is Wrong", mostly, led by Tom Kempson, like, "Batman or Cat:man?" led by Richie Dennis "cc C? Si! Gag me with a SPOOOOON! Si! Oh, wow!" led by Kerwin Bernighan, fer shure, and "Document Unix, like, wow, Are You Kiddin'?" led by Jan Yeats. No Reader Service No. is like, ya know, necessary because all GUGUs (Gurus of Unix Group of Users) already know everythin' we could tell them. -- Dr. Dobb's Journal, oh, baby, June '84